jadesfire: Bright yellow flower (Fandom - AV - Nat plain)
[personal profile] jadesfire
Good lord, I wrote something. I mean, an actual something. With a beginning, a middle and an end. Which is good, because I just got my Star Spangled fic exchange assignment, and need to get back in the habit of, you know, writing.

We won't talk about the fact that this story hit me like a tonne of bricks (or a collapsing building: see story for reference) and kept me up half the night so that I feel like death warmed over today and just want to crawl under my desk and sleep.

Let's concentrate on the fact that I actually wrote something. Thank you, [personal profile] sholio for the perfect prompe <3 I feel like my brain just started working again for the first time in forever. The thing is, the prompt was about Natasha dealing with her fear of Hulk, which is one of the things that really, really stayed with me from the movie. So writing this came very naturally :)



I loved so much what Scarlett Johanssen did with Natasha's fear of Hulk - there's a real panicky edge to it, not just the natural nerves of someone whose job it is to face scary things. Both when she pulls her gun on him in India, and after he nearly kills her in the Helicarrier, she is so seriously freaked out and it shows.

Hulk represents the one thing in this world that she can't beat. She can fight or talk her way out of pretty much any other situation she finds herself in, but Hulk? She can't fight him, and she can't trick him. There's nothing there for her to work with. For someone whose life depends on being competent, on being better, that must be genuinely terrifying. And I love that they didn't hold back on that - Hulk is supposed to be scary!

One thing that often bugs me in fandom is that Natasha is written very...blankly. She's an ice-queen, as though she's so cool and professional that things don't touch her. But that's just not in the film - she's scared of Bruce/Hulk, she's obviously worried about Clint and she's upset when she talks to him later. In Cap 2, she's the one making jokes, teasing Steve, and she's badly shaken after the bunker blows up. She is devastated by Fury's death. There's real emotion there - okay, it's not showy, it's not flashy and a lot of it is hidden under humour, but it's there. Things don't just bounce off her - she cares and tries to act on those feelings. I have to say that every time I come across a story where she isn't just some kind of perfect, cool, femme-fatale, I kind of want to hug the writer.



Link: Falling, with style - links to Avengers Gen atm. I'll put it on AO3 later.

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jadesfire

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